How to Experience Powerful Transformation
You Are Not Self Made
At 19, I thought the right books, the right rooms, and the right mindset would make me into the man I wanted to become.
Surely, listening to CEOs, reading self-help books, and just being me would unlock something great.
I was a freshman at Georgia State University, quickly learning college felt like the 13th grade. So, I skipped classes and went to lunch-and-learns instead, listening to CEOs talk about how they built their businesses.
I rented school books for some reason, but they mostly sat on my shelf while I bought and devoured self-help books and leadership books.
I was pumped that I no longer had seven teachers forcing me to read things I did not care about—love to all my high school teachers; they were amazing. I went from reading zero books in high school to reading books like Think and Grow Rich, How to Win Friends and Influence People, The Magic of Thinking Big, and more.
You get the picture.
I was locked into what I thought was my destiny.
The next great CEO.
And honestly, not all of it was bad. Some of those books taught me discipline. Some taught me leadership. Some taught me to think bigger. After reading Rich Dad Poor Dad, I opened a Roth IRA. In college, I was even able to buy my sister a car.
Those were good things.
But underneath the good ambition, something was still wrong at the roots.
I was trying to become self-made while the God who made me was calling me to become God-made.
The next decision I made would dramatically alter my life forever.
It is also pretty humorous that I thought one year of reading business books and crushing the ambition game would suddenly launch the next Google.
At 23, after hundreds of hours of self-help books, leadership books, motivational YouTube videos, and listening to CEOs, I found myself empty.
I did not want to manifest a future filled with material things.
I did not need a bigger dream.
I needed a new heart.
In God’s great mercy, He reminded me of a habit I had as a kid. A habit that did not produce temporary self-made change, but true transformation.
I Made a Deal With God
I made a deal with God.
Well, not really.
I do not believe you can make deals with God, theologically speaking. But I did say something to Him at a very low point:
“Lord, help me be a reader of Your Word. I want to know You.”
Fifteen years later, daily reading of the Word is still a massive cup filler for me. It pours out over my family, my friendships, and my communities.
And yes, I still make mistakes.
But that prayer became a starting point for true, lasting transformation.
The self-help books were not all bad. Growth is not bad. Discipline is not bad. Leadership is not bad.
But they could not raise me from the dead.
They could not give me a new identity.
They could give me information, but they could not give me resurrection.
That is what makes Christianity different from self-improvement.
Jesus does not merely help bad people become better people.
Jesus makes dead people alive.
By grace alone, through faith alone, in Christ alone, God gives new life (Ephesians 2:8-9). Then, by His Spirit and His Word, He teaches alive people how to walk (Psalm 119:105; Galatians 5:25).
A Case of Mistaken Identity
I find it very merciful that God wired me in such a way that nothing and no one can satisfy me like He does.
He has wired us to long for Him because He made us and sustains us.
Genesis tells us we were made in the image of God (Genesis 1:26). We were made by Him, for Him, and to reflect Him in the world.
Colossians tells us Jesus is before all things, and in Him all things hold together (Colossians 1:16-17).
That means I am not self-made.
You are not self-made.
We are made by God, sustained by God, and remade in Christ.
When I place my value in anything other than Him, even my failures and successes start hiding behind something superficial.
Success can become a mask.
Failure can become a prison.
Ambition can become a god.
But when I align with what His Word says, not merely by agreeing with it, but by trusting Him and putting it into practice, something deep inside me begins to change.
I become a different man.
And the different man starts walking a little more like Christ.
That is the new self.
Not the old self with better habits.
Not the ambitious self with Christian language.
Not the wounded self pretending to be whole.
The new self is life in Christ.
I sometimes tell people, “I have married eight different women.” They usually look at me like I have lost my mind. Then I explain.
I have been married to the same woman, but as my wife walks with Jesus, He keeps transforming her. She is not becoming a better version of the flesh. She is becoming more alive in Christ.
That is what God does.
He is not just bringing out a person who was always hidden there.
He is raising a person who was dead in sin and is now gloriously alive in Him.
Alive people do alive things.
And living things produce living things.
Have you ever seen a healthy tree produce dead fruit?
Me either.
A living tree produces life.
But here is the warning.
The world, the enemy, and our own immaturity will try to choke out that life. So we stay alert. We stay vigilant. We abide in Jesus. We work out our salvation with fear and trembling because it is God who works in us, both to will and to work for His good pleasure.
The new self is not unlocked by trying harder.
The new self is received in Christ.
Then it is formed day by day as we come to Him, listen to Him, trust Him, and obey Him.
Never Finished Challenge
New believer:
Three to five days this week, read a verse in John or a chapter in John.
Pick the same spot every day if you can. Ideally, pick the same time (eliminates decisions your brain has to make).
Before you read, put on worship music. Slow down. Ask God:
“Father, help me become a reader of Your Word. Help me know You. Help me understand what Your Word says about You, about me, and about life in Christ.”
Do not overcomplicate it.
Come to Jesus.
Open the Word.
Ask for help.
Respond with one step of obedience.
Disciplined believer:
Do not listen to the noise.
It gets loud when you continue the habits God has blessed you with. Distraction gets loud. Cynicism gets loud. Hurry gets loud. Pride gets loud.
Keep seeking Him first.
Not to prove yourself.
Not to build an image.
Not to become impressive.
Seek Him because He is life.
Have Jesus for breakfast.
Stop asking the old self to build the new self. Come to Christ. Let the dead man stay buried. Walk as a son or daughter made alive.